epilogue
lessons of experience
Bjob
e honest with yourself (‘‘To thine own self be true,’’
let). Be your own best critic. If you don’t look forward t
when you wake up in the morning, you may be in the
situation.
Becandid—thereisnoplaceforhalf-bakedanswersorfalseinform
But don’t talk too much; instead, be a good listener. It is amazin
therapeutic listening can be for the person who has come to see yo
ample:Thedeanfromaneighboringinstitutioncalledaskingforan
longmeetingthenextdaytoseekmyadviceonanurgentmatter.W
arrived, after the usual brief greeting, he spoke for fifty-nine minu
herosetoleave,hethankedmeprofuselyformyadvice,whichIne
a chance to give.
Keeptheclockinyourofficeaheadbyafewminutes.Ihadminel
onthewallfacingthevisitor.Itwasnotunusualfortheindividualto
gizeforbeingalittlelate,adding,‘‘I’llhurryupandtellyouwhyIw
to seeyou.’’
Never sit behind your desk so there is a physical barrier betwee
and your visitor. Always have a cozy little sitting arrangement in a
theofficewherethevisitorisonanequallevel.Iamalwaysappalled
visitingotherindividuals,especiallygovernmentbureaucrats,who
behindahugedeskdenotingtheirauthority.Oneofthefunniestinte
of my student days was with an assistant dean of theYale Medical
whowas barely five feet tall. He sat on a high chair, and I was on a
six inches off the flooracross from his desk.
Havethecourtesyofgreetingyourvisitoroutsideyourdoor.Atth
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